Weight and Other Things That Make Me Crazy – Cleanse – Day 2

1 Day 2Day 2 almost done of my cleanse or detox.  To make it more interesting, I am doing this during Stampede Week here in Calgary.  For those of you who have never heard of the Calgary Stampede, it’s basically Mardi Gras for cowboys.  10 days of beer, stampede breakfasts, bbqs, parties, rodeos and yee haw!  And I am detoxing.  Not that I am a huge partier anyway but today I went for a walk along Stephen Avenue Mall at lunch.  Stephen Avenue is a street that goes along the length of a good part of downtown Calgary where no cars are allowed during the day.  There are vendors and people everywhere.  I went for a walk to check out what was going on and I was hit with smells of food and beer and things organic.  I made it through okay but stuttered at bit when I walked past all the people eating ice cream with chocolate bars mixed in.  I made it though!

Today I realized how much food and my emotions are tied together.  I knew before but now I really realize how much of an emotional eater I really am and that I use food like a drug.  I use food like an addict would use cigarettes or booze.  It is use to comfort, tune out, soothe, fill time, entertain.  I had enough to eat today but I realized how often I reach for food when I am not really hungry but am filling some sort of emotional need.  It’s been the story of my life so I struggle with it a lot.  I am good with a routine though and when I decide I am going to do something, I do it.  So this detox is perfect.  There are rules and parameters which I need because rather than doing what I know has worked, which is log every bite that goes into my mouth, I tried to “wing it”.  Now I have some structure and rules which I need for myself.  I am a “by the rules” person but also an “all or nothing” so I have realized how much I need to not take this to the extreme.  As Suzanne Evans says, the way you do something is the way you do everything and in this case it is so true.  In some ways it’s a good thing but taken to the extreme it is not.  I can get things done when I set my mind to it but I can also get stuck in trying to “do it right” and not do it at all.

I also realized I filled up quicker with less food, which was interesting.  I have never had that experience before.  I am feeling cleaner and less blocked, but tired.  I haven’t had enough sleep, which is partly to blame but I think my body is also processing all the toxins as well.  I had moments of being a tad emotional and a bit “off” and I have had a headache and achy body for a few days but once I started the protein supplement and milk thistle that eased quite a bit. I quit coffee, sugar, chocolate and wine cold turkey so small bit of wonder my body may be in a bit of shock.

I am noticing that I am enjoying my food more and taking time to taste it and enjoy it.  I had supper tonight and just took my time to eat it.  But I didn’t make a conscious effort to do that, it just happened.  I am appreciating tastes more as well.  I am curious to see what it will be like in a few more days.

We had our call with Roberta Mittman today, who is organizing this detox.  I was incorrect about her credentials.  She is an acupuncturist and nutritional and lifestyle coach.  We had a discussion about what detox is, some of the basics of the program and how to tailor the program to our needs.  I got a lot out of the call.

One of my biggest take aways was when Roberta talked about how the cleanse is something we need to do in our whole life.  We need to detox our diets and our bodies but also look at our life as a whole.  What sort of environment do we live in? Is it orderly or disorganized? What sort of relationships do we have? Are they supportive or toxic? What are our thoughts like? Are they loving and supportive or is the inner critic alive and well and helping to sabotage you one thought at a time? What is your spiritual life like? Your family life? Do you have loving and supportive relationships or do you have more drama than a soap opera? What is your marriage like? Your relationship with your children? The list can go on  but I really am seeing this detox as a metaphor for life.  In order to live our best lives, we need to be clean in all areas of our lives.

Day 3 awaits.  I am curious to see what changes and realizations await.

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